Playlist now available on Spotify.
On a daily basis I use Uber…so that makes me an expert.
Uber doesn’t inform the drivers of their destination until they confirm pickup of the passenger. So now, the drivers are calling the passengers ahead of pickup to ask them:
- “Where are you located” and
- “Where are you going?”
When they realize they haven’t irritated you enough they tell you that they will be right there.
I can see you. Are you new? You never use Uber before?
I didn’t summon you for your muscle memory. Google Maps works just fine for me. I am not a city historian. I don’t know where every building is on every street of every address I put into the system. Let’s assume that you don’t know and that I don’t know and just use the apps (African) “Where are you going“?
Do you think I am too an app?
“WHY are we talking“? says the irritated writer in the sunken place. And what is this driving past me shit and going JUST a little further than where I told you to stop? It has gotten so bad that I now don’t use the correct pick up address if I want to get picked up where I want to get picked up. This is my everyday struggle. Is it just me? Is it just Atlanta?
Yesterday, my Uber driver attempted to have me arrested. Arrested. The police officer got a real kick out of it.
With Uber’s new policy of charging for the ride if the passenger cancels after a certain time period, it has allowed for a new Executive Level of Uber Driver called “UBER Asshole”. With this level of Uber you get:
All of the above plus,
- Uber drivers now can’t find your location
- Driver cancellations
- Refused rides and
- The driver won’t cancel the trip after they refuse to take you somewhere
With UBER Platinum® (patent pending) your driver will have you arrested.